My mother always answers when asked how she is doing with the word Reasonable. The word reasonable is not typically used in response to this question but for the first time I have taken the time to truly understand what the word means when she answers this question. Usually when I am asked this same question my answer differs. Sometimes the answer is blessed and other times the answer is okay. Yet not once had I ever considered saying Reasonable in response to this until today. Watching the first season of Grey’s Anatomy, I have been thinking of ways to change my world for the best of me so that I can move from Reasonable to blessed 100 percent of the time. THe outlook of answering reasonable is the sum of who my mother really is… cold on the edges but soft and warm on the inside built with a large amount of realism. She isn’t an optimist of positive thinking nor is she a disgruntled foreshadowing user of negative thinking either. My mother is Reasonable in her thinking, Reasonable in her faith, and Reasonable in her choices. Using less reason then the word implies. Sometimes this easy to excuse way of thinking drives me into complete disarray of emotional scarring that last long into months and at times years. I wish and hope that I never become Reasonable in my heartbeat, in my beliefs or in my dreams.
Lately my dreams, my goals, my past and my very next breath have become heavy weights of thought in my mind. I have began to analyze and compute the data of who I am with great ferocity. I pray for more resilence and more belief in myself. Today I prayed for reasonable thinking, for reasonable understanding, and for reasonable belief in the good of others, of humanity. I prayed for reasonable clarity. In the most dire of moments, in the most antiquated of activities, in the most daring of emotional risk I asked to be reasonable enough to risk mistake for hope of success and trimumph. I want in my future to be asked.. “How You Doing?” and give the response today I am more than Reasonable, I am happy, I am elated and blessed for the opportunity of another day.
Today I understand that to afford the ability to be more than reasonable I have to be at the least living with reasonable faith. Not just reasonable faith in God but reasonable faith in myself to be better than I was, to make better decisions and to not look at opportunity as something that is awarded to everyone because looking around at life and the people I encounter I know that it’s not. That a hand dealt to you, may have a little to do with the things we can’t explain, but it also means making the best of decisions when we arrive at different signals. DO you go left, do you go right? Are you of the right and reasonable mind to make those type of decisions. What are your motives? What are your triggers? How will it effect not just you, but those you love, those you effect in your small but large world.
As we approach another New Year, think of how you want to answer that question in 2013. How are you doing?
We must admit that sometimes life is not fair, but how fair are you to life?
Do you appreciate your opportunities? Are you thankful for your life? What kind of love to you input into your environment? We may want to think that we have nothing to do with the type of energy we live within?
How are you doing? I hope it’s better than Reasonable.